PUNISHER: WAR ZONE (2008)

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"Easily the worst i've seen in theatres all year! Steven Seagal films have the same effect just rent one and save your cash and time!"

I do not understand why anyone would like this movie unless they crave B-grade Steven Seagal style Direct to DVD action films. Punisher: War Zone is an accurate adaptation of the MAX line of Punisher comics which to me seemed like wannabe Tarantino writing. This movie accuratly depicts this tone by using over the top stunts and wannabe Tarantino dialogue. All in all i think the entire movie has very few redeeming qualities and is without a doubt the worst film i've seen in theatres all year.

Beginning with the acting Punisher: War Zone's cast includes some of the most exaggeratingly bad accents i've ever had the displeasure of hearing in a film particularily Jigsw, Carlos, and the old italien mob boss who have to speak so slowly to even get the bad accent out. Ray Stevenson looks like the punisher...that is all he looks like him he acts like a piece of wood and the script does nothing to develop his character he may as well have been Seagal his limited dialogue includes excruciating lines like "I'd like to get my hands on God".

Visually this movie looks like it was sponsored by crayola with overly bright lighting and near florescent looking tones and hues i understand Lexi wanted a comic book look but this is more cartoony than anything. Speaking of cartoons the action looks so poorly choreographed and can't decide whether it wants to have gritty brawl style fights or lame Jackie Chan mid air triple kick kung fu, neither way works for this film. The gore is non stop but so fake looking and unbelievably cheesy from Frank hanging upside down on a chandeliere to firing a rocket at an acrobatic gangster who like jumping over buildings.

There is no plot at all the whole movie focuses on Jigsaw wanting to kill Castle and Castle wanting to kill Jigsaw nothing more. Dominic West blatantly rips off of Tommy Lee Jones's Two Face from Batman Forever complete with an awful jersey accent. The fat that they try to make Montreal look like NYC is staggeringly brutal because it's so obvious that it's not New York the whole time. Punishers little hideout looks like a torture shack from some direct to DVD horror film or lame Saw sequel. The music on the soundtrack is all $hitty Nu Metal crap like Slipknot and Static X. I absolutley hated this film and all of it's over the top qualities and found not even Julie Benz could redeem any qualities that may be considered good. The 2004 film with Tom Jane was infinitly better than War Zone which is worse than Elektra and Fantastic Four. If a Steven Seagal or Van Damme flick is your thing who knows you may enjoy this.