Valkyrie: Review By MovieGuyMatt

Jan 3rd, 2009 by MovieGuyMatt
SPOILER: Hitler Lives!
  • OVERALL
    2.0
    POOR
  • Story
  • Acting
  • Directing
  • Visuals
My main problem with films of this nature is what also draws me to them. Whenever a film is made based off of true events, the ending is already known to you. The intriguing part is the "how." HOW are they going to have the story play out? HOW are they going to keep me interested whilst at the same time rushing headlong towards events that I know MUST happen?

So, going into "Valkyrie" I was hoping that the film makers-Bryan Singer in this case-were going to achieve this. Of course, as we all know, there were in fact MANY attempts to assassinate Adolf Hitler, all of which failed. We all know that when, in 1945, Berlin was surrounded by Allied troops, Hitler committed suicide.

Why, then, should this film interest me in the slightest? Well, the setup, the grand scheme and the drama of the events should keep my enthralled, eyes glued to the screen in anticipation of each successive event.

Unfortunately, this did not happen. I felt no real connection to any of the characters, or even the events that were transpiring. Each time David Bamber (Adolf Hitler) was on screen the music got somber and I THINK I was supposed to feel this ominous dread. Even Bamber's movements seemed calculated, exaggerated, slow, as if he were moving through thick soup. This, apparently, was to make me feel terrified, or awestruck, I'm not sure which.

Tom Cruise's performance, which, normally I find convincing and rather good, seemed stilted, and a little awkward. I didn't see the fire in his eye(s) that normally accompanies one of his characters.

The supporting cast did about the same as Cruise. This is sad to me, because these are all very good actors, but I never really felt anything. At all. Nothing. I didn't feel tense, I didn't feel sad.

This film committed one the most grievous sins in all the world of art and creation.

It made me feel...NOTHING. At the very least I should have been angered, or a little distraught. And considering the nature of the story it's horrible that this film brought forth no emotions from me whatsoever.

If you feel the need to see it, I recommend putting it in your Netflix queue and seeing it in the comfort of your own home rather than enduring the dangers of the theater: the inconsiderate jerks, the high ticket prices and the highway robbery that is the cost of concession stand food.

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Comments (15)

  1. SCREENWRITER

    I didnt see this. I want tp but i thought there was better to see that came out Christmas Day. Like Button for example.

    3 years agoby @the-screenwriterFlag

  2. T.Clark

    Well, that's the problem, Crypt...you missed an hour of it lmao The second part is the best, the first part, they're in the planning stages...they just don't wanna wing killing a dictator lol

    3 years agoby @insertusernamehereFlag

  3. Vamp

    VIS, I only meant it as a sort of sarcastic comment, but it was also true. I knew Hitler was going to live, I'm just pointing out that he's spoiled it for all of the unlearned idiots out there. :)

    3 years agoby @vampire2000Flag

  4. The CryptKeeper

    Well, VIS, I personally thought it was very boring. Thankfully, the theater manager was nice enough to let me see the next screening of Seven Pounds, only watched about an hour of this one.

    i also didn't like about it... well everything the review stated. nicely put, MovieGuyMatt.

    3 years agoby @catwomanFlag

  5. MovieGuyMatt

    First of all, WOW. Second of all, thank you VIS, I do believe its all been said, and well, at that. MY work here is done. :)

    3 years agoby @arkaydyFlag

  6. T.Clark

    Wow, Crypt...just wow
    What did you not like about it so much?

    For the record, just because you disagree with a review doesn't mean it sucks, it just means it's not your opinion. If he had given one sentence or paragraph of garbage, then the review would have sucked

    3 years agoby @insertusernamehereFlag

  7. Moviemaster75

    This review sucks balls!!! I was even on the urge of tears when the people were executed and this movie rocks and you suck!

    3 years agoby @moviemaster75Flag

  8. Raoul Duke

    HITLER LIVES?!!!! WHHHATTTTTTT! YOU RUINED EVERYTHING FOR ME!

    3 years agoby @raoulduke33Flag

  9. The CryptKeeper

    I agree with the review.

    3 years agoby @catwomanFlag

  10. T.Clark

    Yeah, the headline is not only used to flesh out the dumb ones who were actually surprised to hear Hitler doesn't get killed, but it's also to flesh out the people who actually think movieguymatt is an idiot for "spoiling"...like you, TDK. You just made yourself look like a bigger jackass, because if you had read my comment you'd know the headline is just irony at its greatest...even if I disagree with the rest of the review lmao

    3 years agoby @insertusernamehereFlag

  11. The Dark Knight

    HAHA duh he lives! It says plot to kill hitler in the trailer and if you know anything he shoots himself in the head while he was in a bunker. F*ckin Jackass

    3 years agoby @thedarkknight23Flag

  12. T.Clark

    Good review, but...yeah, I disagree lol You may not have felt anything, but I was on the verge of tears when the people are executed. Besides, the movie was a conspiracy thriller.

    Vamp, Screenwriter: the meaning of the quote is supposed to be ironic and amusing, because everyone with basic knowledge of history knows that they didn't succeed in killing Hitler because he committed suicide. So anyone who actually takes his headline as an actual spoiler is pretty dumb.

    3 years agoby @insertusernamehereFlag

  13. SCREENWRITER

    Good reveiw, MovieGuyMatt but i agree with Vamp. I'm not calling you a jerk or anything but you really shouldnt put spoilers in your titles. People do tend to get mad on movieweb when other members spoil movies.

    3 years agoby @the-screenwriterFlag

  14. Vamp

    Are you sure you and I saw the same movie? This was an amazing movie, and all the performances were amazing. And why the f*ck would you put a spoiler in your quote? That's a jerk move right there.

    3 years agoby @vampire2000Flag

  15. Moviemaster75

    F*CK YOU!

    3 years agoby @moviemaster75Flag