Total Recall: Review By Forrestgump1

Now usually when i think of a "remake" the story and plot typically resembles its original in some way shape or form. Well i guess we live in a new decade where that does not happen. This latest Total Recall is an absolute drag and is boring to boot. I constantly found myself eyeing the exit sign and looking at my clock wondering when this nightmare was going to end. The only positive thing i can comment on is the action was pretty impressive, but when you throw in goofball and corny lines this movie really tends to make no sense. In other words the acting was horrible beyond recognition. With the mere exceptions of John Cho, Bryan Cranston & Bill Nighy, but they are completely underused throughout the picture (Spoiler) hell John Cho dies in his only scene - that was when i started to lose hope. Len Wisemen is not a talented director he decides to take action and put it over the storytelling aspect and to get the so-called message across. When something shocking happens your basically obligated to say "Oh did not see that coming". O wait but i did. Total Recall takes a simply generic formula that made the original such a hit and completely fails on almost all accounts. Colin Ferrell how in the hell did he become a star of this action dud?. There were so many other actors well more qualified then him. But the reality and this helps me sleep at night, By next week this movie will be just a distant memory when The Bourne Legacy hits screens and i'm sure that will be a good action flick.

Story: (2.5/5) - The story here is trying to separate itself as far away from the original as possible. There are some hints at the original like the girl with 3 boobs (which i was surprised considering this was PG13 that we actually got to see them). But really other than that oh and his name is Douglas Quaid. The story is nothing special. Its more than likely the best thing about the film beside the action. But the script really does not give anything for such well known actors to do with. Which leads into Acting. Acting (0.5/5) - This was some of the worst performances i have seen this year I wanted to shoot Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel was totally annoying. While Colin Ferrell's voice gets so deep and its just hard to even hear him. Christian Bale's Batman would be like WTF?. The only good talent in this film was Bryan Cranston as the evil villain if you will where he is in for a whole 10mins. Along with Bill Nighy a wonderfully talented actor that never gets more than 2mins of screen time in the entire movie. Why not cast people we don't care about for the roles of people that are barley in the film and John Cho was the head of Rekall. Directing: (2/5) - While i do give some props to Len Wisemen because the film was not released in 3D - his direction was still muffled and if what he wanted was an action picture and not a good movie well then he succeed.

Overall: (1/5) - The 2012 remake "Total Recall" is an absolute mess, that is not only confusing, but extremely hard to follow. It has some memorable action set-pieces. But with mediocre performances and a terrible script the action is forgettable as was the film itself. With the film as bad as it is, A 1 is the best i can do. If you loved the original to a point where your planning a trip to see this, well than chances are your going to be dissapointed. It has the elements to make for something entertaining and it almost makes for something audiences would remember. But now this film will be lucky to make anything north of $50million. Maybe the world was not ready for a Total Recall remake? or maybe we just did not ask for one. Whatever the case one thing is for sure. Total Recall is a mess. It tries to contrive some story line or resemble a plot but its idea of making you think really only confuses me more. There are so many things going on at once that i began to question my sanity at points and constantly asking myself what the hell is going on?. I was staring at a screen but nothing was holding my attention. But sadly this film fails to accomplish anything. Its truly a sad day when a beloved original classic gets a crappy remake such as this.

D-

ReviewedByNate

RatedPG13

RunTime121mins

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