The Blair Witch Project: Review By slysnide

The worst film ever made. The greatest waste of 8mm film in history. Plagued with stupid teens (seriously, you wouldn't believe it), and nothing memorable other than how bad it is (kinda like a really bad teen comedy of today's standard).

The entire add campaign for the film was utter garbage. A tape was found and a studio was gonna air it in theaters. Yeah right. It would be in an evidence locker. Not in theaters. Yet people bought into it.

No plot, no intrigue, no thrills, no chills, nothing. Just garbage. The saddest thing is that this film was released to become a cultural phenomenon along with 6th Sense (WAY BETTER), and that the uncreative amateurs made off with millions undeservingly due to MAJOR & SEVERE LACK OF CREATIVITY!!!!!! Highway robbery anybody????

The idea of being lost in the woods while in search of a local legend could easily have been scary, but the creativity was butchered beyond belief.

The only thing relatively good was the visuals of the house in the end and perhaps, just perhaps, the first big stick man. I mean, the ending was even bad.

And what's up with the guy standing in the corner like he's taking a piss and should be wearing a dunce cap! Yeah you should! For being in this piece of crap!

But wait, there's something better than that! It's like, they wake up and there's a bundle of sticks with blood and 1 guy's missing. OMG! OMG! OMG! It's supposed to be the first creepy moment in the film!!!!!!!

But I can do you one better! The guy throws away the map when they're lost no less! Hello? Are the lights on up there? If it was real, they got what was coming to them. But since it isn't, then this is sheer lack of creativity and crap!

And why are people STILL in their seats and not demanding a refund from the studio that released this???

The supposed witch it never seen. The mystery is never solved. There is no music, (since it's supposed to be real), there's no sound fx, and yet people STILL bought into it! They shoulda mixed some fx to make up for it! But of course they didn't. But people EVEN STILL bought into it!

And the worst part is (I know, you didn't think it could get any worse from here), that this was THE MOST SUCCESSFUL breakthrough film by amateurs! And sure, they didn't become superstars, but they made off with millions!!!!!!!!

They wanted it to be an instant cultural shocker, (like Psycho), and they got it! WTF????? That ain't right.

As being an amateur film maker, I make it my first objective to beat down this crap with something that's ACTUALLY SCARY, and ACTUALLY INTERESTING AND/OR UNIQUE! Anybody with me?

And don't be mad about the spoilers, cuz this is definitely not worth your money.