Marley & Me: Review By B. Alan Orange

I don’t blame whoever went around Los Angeles spray-painting billboards and bus stops with Marley & Me’s climatic spoiler. When I was a kid, I wouldn’t have wanted to sit through this movie. And I certainly wouldn’t have made it to the end, especially after the devastating loss of my own pet. I probably would have gotten up and left the theater at age eight. Sure, kids are supposed to be more grown-up in this decade of terrorism and consumer nightmares. A film like Marley & Me is given to a younger generation to make them stronger human beings. Its Where the Red Fern Grows for that disinfected generation. That’s all fine and dandy, but still. When I saw the film, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house except mine. And that’s only because I refuse to shed a tear over someone else’s celluloid memories. Other people aren’t as insensitive as me. And a lot of kids don’t want to watch a dog get euthanized.

This isn’t Snow Buddies or some cutesy talking dog movie. Despite that iconic image of an adorable puppy with a big red Christmas bow around his neck, this is an adult drama that just so happens to have a dog in it. And that dog is a real *sshole. Getting right down to brass tacks, this Marley, a golden retriever, is a thoughtless dick. And he’s sprinkled on top of one of the more realistic looks at domestic coupling produced in the last ten years. At its core, this film is really about John Grogan. He is the real life journalist that penned the popular memoir upon which the film is based. I have not read this best seller, so I can’t tell you how accurately they nailed his prose. But one thing's for certain, Marley is almost an afterthought here on the silver screen.

Owen Wilson plays a more grown-up version of himself, placing his push to be accepted squarely on Grogan’s shoulders. He’s sweet and charming, and still sort of funny. But he mopes around a bit, and seems to be taking this task a little too seriously. He’s still Owen Wilson, and his persona so eclipses this real life character, that you never get a sense of who the real Grogan is. Sure, you see his life played out in the proper Hollywood beats, and this is some of the best acting work Wilson has ever done. But Grogan almost becomes lost to the façade that is Owen’s own golden boy persona. And it fits the man like a tight wife beater T.

The Grogan in this film is a newspaper news writer. His published pieces are usually just a few sentences long. He is married to a very beautiful woman named Jennifer who gets her own two-page stories published in a competing paper. And you can feel Grogan slowly being suffocated by his wife’s superior prowess. Played by Jennifer Aniston, the two have a solid chemistry that is sewn through with enough emotion and truthfulness that they indeed seem like a real couple with real emotional issues. Basically, it’s like watching your celebrity friends air their boring dirty laundry on screen. The ups and downs, the ins and outs, the mundane foundation upon which most relationships are based. It’s all explored here with a precise hand. Again, not really kid’s stuff. I could feel my eight-year-old self-growing bored with this while watching it. Yet, it’s the type of film I would have returned too later in life and loved. Like Neil Simon’s Chapter Two, which my mom conned me into seeing simply because it had a Star Wars reference in one scene. I didn’t know what the heck I was watching back then. But I get it now. The same will hold true for your children when they see this.

“Like, what the frick, Mom?”

A lot of Marley & Me’s narrative focuses on John Grogan’s struggle with losing his mansack. He wants to be married, sure. But he hates the bad times. And he can’t stand the thought of completely losing himself to his own impending children. After that first baby is born, it all turns into a septic hole of fatherhood. It doesn’t help that his best friend is swinging (fictional) bachelor Sebastian, a writer living out the good life. Boozing it up with a different woman every night. Grogan doesn’t want to have a baby. Jennifer does. They agree on getting a dog first, and that’s where Marley arrives, a little too late in the film. And he is simply used as a prop to support John’s idea of a simpler life. The only problem is, they’ve picked the worst dog on the planet.

Yup.

Marley never really becomes a character in and of himself. He is used more as a prop or irritant in Grogan’s life. He’s sort of like that picture on the wall in the background that continually falls off and shatters on the floor. Time and again. He does get into some highjinks, that’s for sure. But they are always tied to Grogan’s routine daily quest to live life. Marley is bad at obedience school, and then he knocks over a table at a bar. These two instances are used to push John’s own personal story along. We see how these adventures got him a job being a columnist, a title that he fights against for nearly the entire film. A huge chunk of Marley’s bad dog exploits are extolled in a fast paced montage that is run through with a crisp monologue by Wilson. It sounds just like Crispin Glover doing his audio commentary for Willard. Yeah, it’s shot through at the speed of light with a thousand bits of minute information. It serves as a passing of time, and we are generally pulled through John and Jennifer’s life as a couple well into old age.

Then comes the first heartbreaking scene of emotionally tolerant bad news. Jen is pregnant. We’ve watched them struggle with this for quite some time. They’re a little bit worried about Marley’s behavior problems, especially with bringing this newborn into the house. Does the dog eat the baby? Does the dog drag the baby into the swimming pool and drown it? No. Jennifer has a miscarriage, and it’s sold as docu-drama. Again, I can’t express this enough, Marley & Me ain’t a kid’s movie. It’s a film for older couples that have been together for sometime. And understand what these two people are going through. Eventually, John and Jen have kids. We see them grow up. And then, boom! The end comes with twenty minutes of prolonged, provoked tear jerking. How’s that for sh*tting on your Christmas?

Marley & Me is an exceptional character study into the life of an ordinary couple and their struggle through the ups and downs of existence. It gets a big whoop-doo on that account. Just know what you are walking into. This isn’t some funny dog movie. It’s an emotional rollercoaster that will have you bawling like a newborn baby. If you’re children are sensitive, or have recently lost a pet, its best to keep them at home and let them discover this wonderful little film later in life. When they will actually get something from it. And enjoy it.