Grown Ups: Critic Reviews

Diverting enough to get by, Grown Ups is Adam Sandler growing up -- but not too much.

Feels like the work of people who sat around a table for an hour or so tossing around hackneyed comic notions, then decided to slap them onto the screen and hope for the best.

If root canal surgery feels too childish a torment, may we direct your attention to this ghastly celebrity roast in the guise of a boisterous family comedy.

The actors seem genuinely fond of one another, and the message -- don't pass up life's simple pleasures -- suits its PG-13 rating. And the '80s soundtrack is spot-on. But it isn't enough to salvage this film.

From each obvious setup to its hoary payoff, Grown Ups hews faithfully to its formula...

If you've ever wondered what The Big Chill would be like with old Saturday Night Live castmates -- well, why would you ever have done that?

It's one of those Sandler movies where the inevitable Steve Buscemi cameo passes for the highlight.

It looks like everyone had a good time making Grown Ups. Too bad you can't say the same thing about watching it.

Ever been around a group of friends who crack each other up while you stand to the side and scratch your head?

It's a crude and decent-hearted outing.

During "Grown Ups," I felt a deep sadness every time the audience laughed and the sounds of their chuckles turned into the ringing of the cash register, and all I thought was a grim, simple truth: This, America, is why we can't have nice things.

Grown Ups is a pleasant, genial, good-hearted, sometimes icky comedy that's like spending a weekend with well-meaning people you don't want to see again any time real soon.

It's a tiny bit better than Couples Retreat, so that's good.

Grown Ups betrays everything sweet, sincere and low-key that actuality makes it special.

Beneath all the forced hilarity lies an awful fear of aging - and Sandler is only 43! This is gonna be rough.

The film drifts along on a stream of humiliation jokes -- physical, emotional, sexual, hairpiece-ial.

This bone-lazy film is a comedy only if you believe Kevin James falling off a rope swing is funny.

It's total garbage.

It's like The Big Chill made by morons.

Grown Ups delivers precious few laughs for the sheer volume of comedy talent on offer.

When Grown Ups star and co-writer Adam Sandler repeatedly slapped Rob Schneider in the face with a dehydrated banana, I was jealous of Schneider, who suffered less than I did getting slapped upside the head by this rotting fruit of a comedy.

These guys set out to make a movie where they could crack each other up. At this late date, they can't even manage that.

What might just be the summer's worst movie, no small feat in a season already reeking of foul cinematic emissions.

Now, after that brief time out for a breath of honesty, Adam is back to lining his pockets again.

You find yourself chuckling at a lonely gag that halfway works -- not that I can remember any right now -- and end up shivering with cold sweat, convinced that watching Grown Ups has permanently damaged your sanity and intelligence.