Friday the 13th: Review By Soylent Green:The Devil's Eyes

Feb 19th, 2009 by Soylent Green:The Devil's Eyes
You just dug your own grave, bitch.
  • OVERALL
    4.5
    SUPERB
  • Story
  • Acting
  • Directing
  • Visuals
Normally I would thrash this movie till the cows come home. BUT, Marcus Nispel's Friday the 13th is possibly the best horror film I have seen in years.

When I first heard about a Friday remake I felt dread. I felt "How could they do this to me?", "How could they do this to the franchise?"

But on Saturday, February 14th my friends and I snuck into the flick- and got in trouble with a couple cops in the process. The theater was crawling with them. I watched the "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" teaser (which looks as cool as Chuck Norris) and walked out of the theater during the "Last House on the Left" trailer. And when I came back to the theater the Paramount logo was on the screen and I took my seat. And Pamela Voorhees was decapitated.

It was no remake. It was a sequel. I breathed a sigh of relief and screamed for the first time in a long time at a horror film. The film had all of the horror cliches that I have loved for years such as the terrible acting, the GORE, the girls falling down while being chased, the nearly indestructable killer, and of course, the smoking hot chicks with "stupendous" breasts.

Platinum Dunes boasts a terrific horror film that I will hold in my heart as a GOOD horror film (except for the ORIGINAL "Saw") from the 21st century.

Congrats gentleman and thank you for not raping one of my favorite horror films.

Body count = 13(??? Unsure)

Next up, the finale, Part XII: Friday the 13th.

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Comments (7)

  1. Vamp

    Great review man. I absolutely loved this movie. It was better than I imagined it would be. Again, man, great review!

    3 years agoby @vampire2000Flag

  2. BlizZzario, Bizniches

    13 is correct, and I said the same thing when I heard about the remake, but Halloween was great, My Bloody Valentine was Great, and the rest should be great, but will shall see, i agree with the review and rating

    on side note isn't going to the movie theaters getting out, that dosent make sense, she said that becuase she didn't like this movie or dosen't like horror movies

    zZz

    3 years agoby @blizzzardFlag

  3. Soylent Green:The Devil's Eyes

    whatever.

    3 years agoby @jcisawesomeFlag

  4. Shelley

    Don't worry about it soylent, brandy is obviously just a negative person who is here with the express purpose of trying to tick people off. I guess she forgets that everyone is different and we all have out own likes/dislikes.

    3 years agoby @shelleyFlag

  5. brandys78

    you don't get out much do you...

    3 years agoby @brandys78Flag

  6. Shelley

    I think you are correct with a body count of 13 if I am remembering correctly. Good review.

    3 years agoby @shelleyFlag

  7. 313td

    Nice review

    3 years agoby @313tdFlag