Babylon A.D.: Critic Reviews

Babylon's plot is a lumpy mixture of The Fifth Element and Children of Men, while its dystopian future references Blade Runner, Dune, and The Matrix.

The only explicable thing about Babylon A.D. is that it was not screened in advance for critics.

You don't need to have a grudging affection for Vin Diesel to appreciate this dunderheaded comic-book adventure - although, obviously, it helps.

When this Vin Diesel vehicle isn't pointlessly frenzied, it's narratively inert, wasting some decent production design, and a French-flavored cast primed for fun.

An abysmal French thriller in which everyone -- Diesel included -- speaks as if they've learned their lines phonetically.

A must-see only for fans of snowmobile chases.

A noisier, costlier version of Children of Men, yet lacking that film's social-political significance and jaw-dropping direction.

'I'm very unhappy with the film,' the director recently told an online magazine. Join the club.

Think of it as Sunset Bloodsport with Jean-Claude as Norma Desmond.

This is a case of a potentially epic tale being pruned and diced to the point where its underlying ideas are reduced to trite cliches.

[A] futuristic mess of biblical proportions.

Babylon feels like an almost random pastiche of good and bad. There may be a deadly virus, or genetic engineering, or a virgin birth, or some combination of all, it's not clear.

Violent actioner is dull, dreary, and defective.

A joyless mess of a movie.

There are moments here that are spectacular, and there are many more that are spectacular failures.

Kakostimeni apopeira foytoyristikis klotsoperipeteias, me metaiores senariakes akrobasies, tsoyhteres eksarseis melodramatismoy, asygkratites aythairesies metafysikoy kai enohlitikes omoiotites me to Pempto Stoiheio (1997), poy dinoyn neo noima stin euro-

With bland protagonists and power figures unpleasant enough for us to want them out of our sight more than we want them defeated, it doesn't do much to hold our interest.

Skip it aggressively.

I unfortunately had a seat that faced the screen and I have two hours of my life that I will never get back.

This occasionally lavish, often clunky venture is consistently watchable if not terribly memorable or distinctive.

As if the gruff dialogue isn't bad enough, the action scenes are merely adequate.

I call it (sneeringly, natch) the 'New Nihilism,' but, to be fair, it's really just the old, Franco-Prussian existential angst hole ratcheted up and dumbed down for our not so brave new world.

Whatever happened to Mathieu Kassovitz, the French actor director whose amazing film La Haine made such an impact 13 years ago?

Strap yourself in for some pure violence and stupidity.

It's as though the film's final act was accidentally deleted on the digital editing console.