Forums: Kerouac's Weekly Rant #2

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  • 12 years ago
  • I know what you're all thinking.
    "Dude, get over yourself. You JUST posted #1 and you're already starting a thread for the as-yet-unposted #2?"

    Relax, that's not the case. In preparation for Rant #2, Iwanted to procure some information from y'all. Here's the deal.. post you FAVORITE and LEAST FAVORITE B-Movies in this thread, as well as your feelings on B-movies in general.... That's all.. just a little research.

    Thanks,
    :idea: Kerouac
  • 12 years ago
    • Brian
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    Killer Clowns From Outer Space
  • 12 years ago
  • Um, Kerouac didn't you state in another thread that you were an icon? Now your asking for our help...

    The best and worst B-movies of all time is quite a challange since generally the movies aren't really that good but I would have to say that "The Evil Dead" has got to be the greatest. No slight to your choice Brian. I mean i can never get enought of clown heads exploding into confetti, but who can resist an uncredited story by Sam Rami that lead to the second greatest "Evil Dead I"

    The more I think about it Sam Rami's has mad a career out of make a B-movie then a safe pic. Would you call eithe Spiderman or Spiderman 2 a safe flic. Oh well there goes that theory.
  • 12 years ago
    • Brian
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    Day Of The Dead
  • 12 years ago
    • lee
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    Tough choices, Kerouac!

    Best B-Movie's:

    Barbarella! (Please, please don't let Drew Barrymore remake this!)

    The Evil Dead series (anything with Bruce Campbell is fun!)

    Forbidden Planet

    I also have to admit a childhood fondness for all Japanese Monster movies - Godzilla, of course, being the top runner!

    Worst B-Movies:

    Beastmaster II
    Highlander II & III
    And, of course, anything with Bridgette Nielsen!

    It's a big, big topic! Enjoy!

    (P.S. Brian - thanks for the great logo! As you can see, I cut out a piece for my Avatar! Too Cool!)
  • 12 years ago
    • lee
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    Great rant Kerouac!

    I can't believe I forgot to mention Tremors. When I first got a DVD player, my sister immediately bought me the Tremors DVD. I've watched it dozens of times! The second one was OK. I haven't seen the third one yet, but the commercials showing the critters flying, jet propelled by giant flaming farts, just brings on a smile! :lol:

    The guys at Troma still keep the B-movie's alive, but only on life support. It's like they aspire to B-movie status, but can't quite get there...

    And there's always Bruce Campbell. That guy could make a successful B-movie out a Preperation-H commercial. I just saw something called Attack on Dome 4. It was a horrible rip off on Die Hard, but in space. Bad beyond belief - except for Bruce Campbell as the megalomaniac villian. Way over the top!

    Deep Blue Sea should have been a B-movie - it would have worked much better. But it was, as you said, a B-movie that got to big for it's britches.

    What do think was the last good B-movie that was made with the intention of being a B-movie? The last one I can think of was Army of Darkness, but there has to be something more recent.

    Anyway, keep up the great work! Nice banner, too!
  • 12 years ago
    • bobby
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    what about movies that try to be something greater but failed and have become B movies in posterity....Howard the Duck for example. Thye wanted this movie to be something great and catchy but I definitely think it falls into at least a semi-b Movie catagory
  • 12 years ago
  • Bobby,

    You're absolutely right, my man! Howard the Duck is a PRIME example of a movie that just didn't work, but it found B-movie status! And do you know why? Because it was released in theaters. People had a chance to go see it, loath it, rip it apart with friends, and then enjoy ripping it apart every time they watched it after. Eventually, they realized that it was so bad it was fun. But these films, I think, are the anomoly of B-Movies. The truly good ones go for B-Movie stature right off the bat.

    My favorite B-Movie has to be Tremors. When Kevin Bacon kills one of the creators and screams "F*CK YOUUUUU!" I damn near piss myself with delight.

    Father Rant, thanks for posting! Now you just need to register, pick or create an avatar, and become part of the Lights Out disfunctional family.... It sounds like you've got some great stuff to add.

    ps. When are there going to be some home brews ready?? :roll:

    ~ Kerouac
  • 12 years ago
  • This may be a stretch to call a b-movie but it was the second movie after the feature so I'm calling it a b-movie. Key Witness (1960) Staring Jeffery Hunter and Dennis Hopper. Below is the plot (from IMDB). One of my favorites.

    An average Los Angeles citizen witnesses a gang murder when he stops to use a telephone. Aware that he is the only witness against them, the gang members seek out his identity and terrorize him and his family to keep him from testifying against them. Only by psychologically playing one gang member against the others is the man able to bring the police to his rescue.
  • 12 years ago
  • I've never heard of that one!
    I don't know that I'd call it a B-Movie by today's standards, but by the standard you gave in your first post, it certainly fits. Plus, with Dennis Hooper, I've got to check it out.

    I think I'm going to pick up the special edition DVD of Blue Velvet next week (it came out Tuesday). All I can think of is Hopper with the Nitros "Oh I'm slutty.. Oooohhh I'm slutty!"
    That guy is CLASSIC!

    ~ Kerouac out!
  • 12 years ago
  • Father Rant and Kerouac in the sam thread. This spells big trouble.
    I'd like to come to the defense of Howard the Duck as a B-Movie. This movie absolutely amazing. Where else would you be able to see a duck trying to have his way with a krimped hair Lea Thompson.

    While Tremors is a good flick I think that tha lame attempt to make a part three simply ruins the franchise. The creators were able to spread a weak idea way farther than should of been possible. The third installment was simply boring.

    Thats my opinion. Sorry Kerouac. I'm really starting to worry about your taste in films.
  • 12 years ago
    • bobby
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    But that is the story of Hollywood in the last 20 years they spread EVERY idea too thin. I mean come on Psycho 3 ? Not necessary. Or how about Alien 12 or whatever they are on. Now I'll admit the first three were warranted but after that let it go people. Jaws 4, completely pointless. Well now look what you've done I'm all riled up on my Anti-Hollywood kick!
  • 12 years ago
  • Bobby,
    I agree with you, brother. The SECOND a film makes money it gets turned into a franchise, and eventually, gets ruined.
    Look at The Fast and the Furious. Good lord, that movie SUCKED, but it made bank, so they've already got #2 in the works, and #3 is just waiting in the wings...

    Doofy,
    I never said anything about Tremors 2 & 3. Why? Because I agree... they SUCKED. Don't question my taste in films! I'll whoop your ass, punk! :lol:

    Hollywood takes a good idea, and to quote Bilbo Baggins, "Speads it too thin, like butter over too much bread."

    ~ Kerouac
  • 12 years ago
    • bobby
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    I'm just glad someone else agrees with me that Fast and the Furious was a bad movie. See, this is the problem with the film industry today, they aren't in it for the art of it or the storytellig or even the fun, they are in it for the greenbacks....and that my freinds is a shame.
  • 12 years ago
    • Brian
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    Watch Out....Mushy loves Fast & The Furious!!!
  • 12 years ago
    • lee
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    I'll join your club! F & F sucked. Besides the fact that it was a weak rip-off of Point Break (which wasn't too bad - but it makes a poor launching point,) the whole thing just seemed like they were winging it from the start. Ok, let's make a list.

    1) Poor rip-off of Point Break, without Keanu's Unintentional Comedy Rating (he's way up there.)

    2) Vin Diesel - a good, charasmatic actor placed in a tired script. It's no wonder he blew off the sequel.

    3) Bad Dialog - they were just flat wrong a number of times. You don't double clutch when you're drag racing!

    4) The standard goofy, ADD computer genius. Just a dumb stereotype.

    5) The breakdown of the goofy ADD guy. You knew this was coming from the start. And it still didn't make sense when it happened. And everyone knew where he was going! I guess somebody just had to die...

    6) The total lack of mystery about the theft ring. This could have been a key plot point/twist. Instead, it was just flat.

    7) Sure, everybody can turn up $100,000 10-second car overnight with raising anyone's suspisions. Or just build one real quick. On a delivery boy's salary.

    8) The bad guys - just your standard run-of-the-mill mean Asian gang with a propensity for shooting cars.

    9) Diesel tried to escape the cops on foot? In a car movie?

    10) The girls - who wanted them?

    11) Paul Walker - he should have just worn a cop hat, just in case one of the dumb guys didn't figure him out right away.

    12) The cars - boring, except for the one Diesel drove once, and then wrecked.

    Despite the above list, I don't actually hate the film! But I wouldn't watch it again...

    Anybody want to add to the list? We could pull it all together and post it as a review in IMDB!

    Lee
  • 12 years ago
    • Brian
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    Here's a great B-Movie...IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS.
  • 12 years ago
  • Lee,

    I agree with all of your points, except # 2. You honestly think Diesel is a "good, charismatic actor"? WOW! This guy is one of my LEAST FAVORITE actors working right now. I think he has the charisma of a dead deerr on the side of a highway. He has NO range... all he can play is the big, unintentionally dumb, musce-head. He has my least favorite role in one of the finest films ever made (Saving Private Ryan). I was HAPPY to see him get killed in that.

    Damn I hope he never stumbles upon these boards.. I'd be a dead man!

    ~ Kerouac
  • 12 years ago
    • lee
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    Kerouac,

    Ok, I'll admit that the jury is still out on Diesel. I think his performance in Pitch Black was fantastic, but I've seen little else that I can even call good. I really think his performance, and the writing for his character, brought Pitch Black up to the level of a classic movie. Without him, it would have dropped off the radar.

    I probably think of Diesel higher than he deserves because of the frame of reference I use for him. He's a big action-type star, so I put him the group with Stallone, Segal, Van Damme and, of course, Arnold. So, considering the group, the guy's a good actor!

    Now that Diesel has moved up the food chain in Hollywood, he should be able to chose better projects and have more influence on them. Then we'll find out if Pitch Black was a lucky shot, or a sign of things to come...

    Lee
  • 12 years ago
  • Let me join the anti-Diesel club as well. I hardly think he could be characterized as charasmatic. Dry, boring, complete lack of personality, I don't know maybe he's trying to hard.

    Lee, did you actually call Pitch Black a classic? How? Why? I'm completely lost. That movie was even worse than F and F. There was nothing classic about that movie. The only remotely original thing about the whole film was the bad guy not getting killed. But I supposed to keep the story open for sequels.
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