Wrong Turn DVD: Review By justincase

I used to live in Maryland. Everyone on the east coast makes fun of the inbred home-boys in the hills of West Virginia. It's kind of funny, too, because the other day some guy emailed me all on the offensive about the film's treatment of West Virginia residents and their reputation as incestual hill-dwellers. I hadn't even seen the movie yet (it having collected some dust since my acquisition of the disc via an online video retailer). DAMN, man! I'm not the one that launched that urban legend... Why are you attacking me?

If nothing else, this hillbilly's correspondence intrigued me and got me to pop in the disc and drop back on the pillows to check out the flick.

From the opening scenes and the news-clipped credits, I knew I was in for a theme-bound slasher. I'd say I was expecting a bad knock-off of a Jason outing performed by a band of roving brother-fathers from the West Virginia outback. I wasn't proven wrong.

The movie was, however, surprisingly enjoyable -- from a sheer "killing some time" point of view. It was even a little bit... "chilling". Probably because I've lived close enough to West Virginia to smell the stench wafting from the abode of more than one of these hideous hillbillies. I don't know. Maybe it was late, but by the second "pair" of killings, I was dug-in and ready for the full 84 minute assemblage. It wasn't as tense a ride as The Ring, but the pace was pretty good once we got into the "meat" of the movie and kept me along for the ride... Right up until we hit the tree-tops, but that is another story altogether.

While I was in the midst of the story-line, I had only one overwhelmingly blatant white-hot poker of an issue stabbing me in the eye... These inbred abominations are all (or at least apparently so) male. How did the inbreeding take place? Are these three hapless hunks all that remain of a once great tribe of incestuous cannibals? Of course, the nature of inbreeding means that your lineage will die-out before it broadens out. Natural selection, if you will. But I was a bit disappointed, after the opening credit sequence, at the relatively insignificant number of perpetrators we have here.

And one other thing, while I'm in gripe-mode. How is it that, after all of the headlines and feature stories we glimpse in the beginning credits about this crazy band of brothers, the authorities never managed to catch these guys? I mean... they've hijacked a small city worth of tourists and keep their cars parked out in an open field -- all covered in blood. Could no-one manage a simple fly-over looking for those 2 hikers in that pukey Pontiac Aztec? I used to park a motorhome and a pick-up truck that I hunted in alongside my house in Montana (back in the day) -- all covered in blood from a fresh deer and antelope slaughter (best record, 21 animals in 2.5 days!). I can tell you that got more than a passing glance and a repeated fly-over from the local fish and game folks.

As you get to know me by reading my reviews, you'll come to realize that -- like all good "early" DVD junkies -- I used to care about special features. When the format was new and I only was at about the couple-hundred mark in my collection, I used to attempt to wade through the stuff on those discs. But who has time anymore?

Double-disc sets. More catalog fare being released every day. New releases... Too much on the plate already. Sure, I'll stick it out and couch-surf through the features if I really want to dig into some history on a battle pic like Black Hawk Down or check out more info. on James Bond's gadgets.

Bottom line is -- now, I sit down for a couple of hours of entertainment and I'm looking for some escapism...not interactivity. I don't want to search through those menus anymore... looking for every tidbit I can lay my eyes and ears on.

Does this disc have special features? YES.

* Commentary by director Rob Schmidt and stars Desmond Harrington and Eliza Dushku

* Theatrical trailer(s)

* Deleted scenes

* Four featurettes: "Making of Wrong Turn," "Eliza Dushku: Babe in the Woods," "Stan Winston," "Fresh Meat: The Wounds of Wrong Turn"

* Poster concept art gallery

* Full-screen and widescreen anamorphic formats (although why you'd want to watch in full-screen is beyond me)

Can I tell you anything about them? NO.

Blow $20 on the disc and check them out if you want... Or don't.

In the end, I wasn't terribly disappointed that I'd exceeded my self-prescribed bed time by nearly an hour and a half to add this to my "watched" list.

Is it a BLIND BUY? For you? Well, I don't know. I pretty much BLIND BUY everything, irrespective of quality -- so that is my disclaimer.

I guess the way I look at it is: You would have spent $20 to see it in the theater (with admission, popcorn, soda, etc. -- probably MORE than that), so... really... what isn't a BLIND BUY?

Why did I give it a 3.5, overall, and only a 3 for the movie? Well, it's a DVD. That ought to be worth something. If it were on VHS, I'd have deducted at least half a star, so...

And if you ever get out to West Virginia after watching this flick, I'd suggest you head out with your handgun on your hip. I ain't takin' any chances of gettin' invited to a hillbilly dinner party.