He's Just Not That Into You DVD: Review By B. Alan Orange

Based on Greg Behrendt's book of the same name, which was crafted from a witty aside uttered on Oprah, this Hollywood fantasy pretends too look at romantic relationships with a profound eye streamed from our own bloated realty. Really, though, it's a bag of dogsh*t thrown on-screen and lit afire to make crazy people feel better about themselves. Sure, it wallows in truisms, but the characters are so garishly cartoonish, there's no one to root for in the whole bunch. They are all annoying, and only Ken Kwapis' astute direction keeps this thing from sinking into the pit of despair like a bit of old moldy lunchmeat. He is swift with his multiple storylines, never giving us a chance to truly hate on them in the moment. Things zip from one dysfunctional lonely heart to the next, and there is enough loose humor to keep us somewhat entertained. But at the end of the day, this is nothing more than a hunk of fabricated Swiss cheese with holes aplenty. It's a vanity project not unlike Ocean's 11, only these actors come away looking a little worse for wear. Hollywood's three leading J(Gi)ennifers are all gathered together and made a fool of. Watching the film, you'll wonder why you ever liked them at all. First up is Gigi, who grounds the story with a lopsided heart. She is the apex of the script, and brings the narrative through line upon which all other romantic stories are hung. Played by True Love's Ginnifer Goodwin, this woman is a straight-up nutcase. She can't seem to get a second date from any willing man, and is prone to stalking her prey with reckless abandoned. She hopelessly waits by her phone for guys to call her back. She is beyond needy, and more than a bit insane. She starts talking advice from a bar owner (Justin Long), and before long, she is on his jock, too. Jennifer Aniston plays a woman who wants to get married, but her guy (Ben Affleck) won't commit to the ring. They have a falling out, but eventually come to realize marriage after seven years of courting isn't everything. Then, we have Jennifer Connelly. She plays a somewhat happily married woman whose husband (Bradley Cooper) cheats on her (with Scarlett Johansson). She's okay with that. They can work it out. What sets her off is that he's been lying about smoking cigarettes in the back yard. Watching this strange trio of women makes you never want to jump into any kind of relationship. Ever. But the guys in the film have got it way worse. They are all dumb bricks striving to make it through to the end of another harried romantic comedy in tact. Drew Barrymoore and Kevin Connolly also show up, but their miniscule screen time doesn't add much to the mix. He's Just Not That Into You is harmless enough if you don't take it too seriously. But, God, is it ever ridiculous.

There are a handful of deleted scenes with optional commentary by director Ken Kwapis. There is an awkward, intimate birthday party moment between Kevin Connelly's character and Scarlett Johansson's on-screen mother that revolves around a Tim Buckley record. It's hard to see where this would have even played within the context of the film. Except that it makes Connelly's character more of a sad sack. There's also another scene between Johansson and her mom (the great Teresa Russell who is completely excised from the finished film), where they talk about "settling for a man". Johansson's Anna actually gets a whole back-story here in the deleted scenes, and a chance to sing. If you are a hardcore fan of the actress, it's worth checking out. She becomes much more rounded and tolerable. In fact, with this handful of deleted scenes focusing solely on her character, she is the only female here that is truly relatable and likeable. We also get to see one of Gigi's discarded dates. It does nothing to make her character any less creepy. Actually, its one of the more embarrassing Gigi moments, and that's a hard feat to pull off. Lastly, there is an alternate scene between Kevin Connelly and Drew Barrymoore where they meet on a gay pride parade float. Their chance meeting in the film is way better off, and I can see why this got dropped. Kwapis is very insightful when talking about these scenes and their intended place in the finished film. It's too bad we don't have him talking over the entire movie. It might have made the experience a little bit more worthwhile.

The film is presented in both its original 2.40:1 aspect ration and in full frame mode. In color. The runtime is two hours and nine minutes. It is rated PG-13 for sexual content and brief strong language.

The film is presented in English Dolby Digital 5.1. Subtitles are in English and Spanish.

They somehow managed to squeeze everyone's head on the front of this DVD. Everyone is smiling, which makes it feel really creepy. You're definitely getting an ensemble movie. And that concept is sold in the artwork. The pinkness of it screams "For girls only!" And the little candy heart offers this up as some sort of off-season Valentine to give to those you hate. Drew Barrymoore is prominently featured on the back of the box, which is weird, because she is hardly in the film. I'd leave this one alone if I didn't know any better.

He's Just Not That Into You is pure American cheese. It's a living cartoon that really isn't as clever as it pretends to be. It's watchable on some levels, but its also rather annoying. If you are looking for a good romantic comedy, you could do a lot better than this. I'm sure. Rent it if you're so inclined, but certainly don't buy it.