G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra DVD: Review By Jami Philbrick

With the exception of having the opportunity to see a few of your favorite childhood characters come to life on the big screen, "GI JOE: The Rise Of Cobra" is a complete bastardization of the childhood of anyone that grew up playing with the popular toys, reading the comic or watching the cartoon. At times you get the idea that the filmmakers weren't even completely sure what film they were making, just throwing any big action sequence they could against the wall and hoping it would stick. The film acts as an origin story, of sorts, for Cobra introducing us to the future Destro, James McCullen played by a mask-less Christopher Eccleston. McCullen has invented a nanotechnology-based weapon that he is selling to NATO and the US Army is helping him transport it. When Army soldiers Duke (Channing Tatum) and Ripcord (Marlon Wayans) are ambushed by a team led by the villainous terrorist Baroness (Sienna Miller), who Duke recognizes as his ex-girlfriend Ana, the JOE's are called in. Led by Snake Eyes (Ray Park), Scarlett (Rachel Nichols) and Heavy-Duty (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje) the JOE's ask Duke and Ripcord to stand down but when they refuse the Baroness is allowed to get away.

Now introduced to the world of GI JOE, a top multi-government elite military program, Duke and Ripcord meet General Hawk, the JOE's leader and he invites them into the program. After a brief training period and introduction to the Accelerator Suits, special armor that accelerates your every move, the team is dispatched to stop McCullen and the Baroness, who are now known to be working together. They are also in league with Snake Eyes' childhood enemy, Storm Shadow, who killed his master as we see this history play out in flashbacks. Also working with McCullen is Dr. Mindbender who actually invented the nano-mites, which can do much more than just destroy metal, and is not exactly who he claims to be. Finally, working with McCullen is Zartan (Arnold Vosloo) a master of disguise that eventually pulls off a plan to replace the US President played by Jonathon Price.

After a lengthy fight to stop McCullen's team from destroying the Eiffel Tower, the Baroness and Storm Shadow capture Duke and the JOE's must launch a rescue mission. It is finally reveled that Dr. Mindbender is not the good doctor at all but in fact Duke's former best friend and the brother of Ana (The Baroness), a ex-solider named Rex. It is Rex who becomes Cobra Commander by using the nano-mites to not only control the Baroness and McCullen but also put the mask on McCullen that would transform him into Destro. The film ends quite anti-climatically with the JOE's capturing the two villains and Cobra Commander declaring revenge on all.

Although I did like the film's origin approach for Cobra and some of the other aspects of the GI JOE property that were brought to the big screen this movie fell real short of what it could have been missing out on many of the characters and fun that has made this such a successful franchise for so many years. The script is downright ridicules at points and the direction by Stephen Sommers in hallow at best. Ray Park is perfect and it really is the Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow relationship that makes this film at all worth recommending. I thought Sienna Miller was quite good as the Baroness as was Christopher Eccleston and Arnold Vosloo as Destro and Zartan, respectively. But Dennis Quaid is almost laughable as General Hawk and Marlon Wayans has absolutely no business being in this film. His comedy relief is part of what belittles this film for true fans. In the end, the film takes what could have been a brilliant action franchise dedicated to the fans and cherry-picks it until all is left is a mediocre action movie with some decent moments at best.

The features are pretty bare-boned here only offering two halfway decent featurettes. The first is a making of featurette and the second is a look at the making of the Visual FX. Neither are particularly lengthy or even chalked full of any real insight other than the fact that the filmmakers made up a lot as they went a long. In fact one of the most interesting things about the commentary with director Stephen Sommers and producer Bob Ducasy is just how candid they are about how little they knew about the property. They admit that there wasn't even much of a script when they started, due in part to the Writer's Strike and that they changed most of the third act while they were shooting. They even point out some continuity errors as well. However, at times Sommers does come off as not having much respect for the Hasbro property and that is a problem for die-hard fans. He does however address the rumors that he was at one point fired and locked out of the Editor's cutting room. To hear the director talk about this in his won words is very interesting. Finally, I am glad to report that this DVD does come with a digital download so you can easily put it in your ipod or on your computer.

The film is presented in widescreen format enhanced for 16:9 TV screens. The runtime is one hour and fifty-seven minutes. It is rated PG-13 for violence and brief strong language.

The film is presented in English Dolby Digital 5.1. Subtitles are in English, Spanish and French.

The cool thing about the packaging is that Paramount decided to do the same thing that they did with the "Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen" DVD and add something cool and different to the packaging so be sure not to just throw away the slipcover this time. With a digital camera, either external or on your computer, you can make a hologram of Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow squaring-off and watch them fight each other. By logging on to the appropriate website you can make this hologram jump off of the DVD's slipcover and I think that the technology is pretty cool and makes for some good fun with the packaging as apposed to most DVD's where the slipcover is just a replica of the DVD's own cover.

In the end, anyone who is not fully aware of the world of GI JOE will probably find "GI JOE: The Rise Of Cobra" to be a decent summer escapism film. But true fans of the Classic Hasbro toy will feel short-changed by the movie. It's lack of plot or character development, with the exception of the ninjas, is inexcusable. There are many cool effects and explosions in the movie but without the heart and intelligence behind the storytelling it just feels cheap and uninteresting. Much like Brian Singer did with "X-Men," or more recently J.J. Abrams' with "Star Trek," you hope that even if the filmmaker is not a fan of the property he is adapting that at least he respects it as important to the real fans and you just don't get that feeling here with Sommers. To him it was a chance to make another summer blockbuster and at the end of the day, this is all it was. So if you're looking to fulfill your GI JOE cravings, don't look here, instead rent the classic cartoons from our childhood that are available on DVD. But if you are looking for a frivolous, fun action movie that you don't really need to use your brain for then look no further because you've found it.